Saturday, 31 May 2014

escape from camberwell (with kurt russell)

Let us go then, Kurt and I,
leave Camberwell behind just like a sty,
to mimic the cask wine hipsters in a city park
we’ll let loose another calamitous cry:
I’m drunk!
Distorted!
Distended!
Stumbling from the Smith,
my Cherubic features gone awry!
I am no saint,
my halo has fallen to my feet
and, clearly, I am only mortal meat
looking for loquacious ladies
suspect to my suspicious spell
(it’ll all be another poem to tell).

Chapel St shimmers incandescent scintillation.
I’m in Lala Land!
With Grey Goose vodka, ice, and fresh lime in hand
there are no cardigan scarf geriatrics,
no extra hot skim milk caps
served in a poor man’s skull,
no Indian word that means ‘slow death,’
only a sky we call down to us,
snort a star and see resplendent light.

Revs roar for me.
We’ll have another VB.
It tastes like tar gone to cool crystal, but
I could not be anymore goddamn cheerful,
like a man trying to abuse sobriety,
and lose the same old memory,
I run my fingers through the fissures of the sofa fabric,
then ineloquently across my gums,
and my grin, once manic, becomes suddenly plastic.

Kurt is dolewave dancing!
Disenchanted, but drinking!
He’s Dick Diver grinding.
Or is it Melbourne shuffling?
Until some tattoo mask of sinking spirals
stops the fast forward motion.
Kurt stares at me,
his face twitching commotion,
and, over everything, he bellows:
“Have you heard of the portly prince of Prahran, Apollinaire?
Always assumes a Parisian air,
loves an obese obscenity
like a minstrel gently fucking a shark.
He’ll bring the clown car:
the means of our getaway
we’ll take with us to our horizon
—these stars taste terrific.
Did I tell you recently that I love you man?”

He licks my cheekbone.

“Did you know her man?”

Kurt stays behind to seduce the sun.
Solo, I walk High St,
a pinched pint of balmy beer
all that bears witness to an idea
which brings you back in.
These weekends will not be the same.
I need to remember how to forget. 

Wednesday, 21 May 2014

yo momma

Yo momma so German she’s a Volkswagen.

Yo momma so rigorous she always prepares a litter box when she lets the cat out of the bag.

Yo momma howl so loud she’s destroyed by madness, starving hysterical naked, dragging herself through the negro streets at dawn looking for a megaphone to further up her decibels.

Yo momma so pedantic when she rides through the desert she names her horse.

Yo momma so fearful of marsupials she equates any enclosed moist space with a pouch and refuses to enter, and never has a nice word to say about kangaroos who have almost had enough of her petty insults.

Yo momma so hirsute her moustache married your dad and gave birth to three yetis: Paul, Arnold and Marilla.

Yo momma so weary of this ancient world she purchased a DeLorean.

Yo momma so cranky the chip on her shoulder is crinkled, has a deceptive gravitational pull and at times seems to illustrate a certain self-consciousness.

Yo momma so confused she spent a season in hell where every wine flowed and she took Beauty in her arms, but thought she was in Ireland.

Yo momma so accepting she don’t just bite the bullet, she makes it into a fine bullet seafood stew.

Yo momma so creepy she’s Abbott’s wink.

Yo momma so hip hop she don’t just raise the roof, she elevates the ozone layer, and when she crunk the world crunk in time with her.

Yo momma is a collage eliminating any notion of her as a single, stable idea: she is a grumpy cat, a Joycean pun, a Grecian urn, Wesley Snipe’s better half, a goat singing Swift, a dice cup, an awkward typographical arrangement, and a love curse uttered by a witch-gypsy in the final throes of her obsession with lust and knitting.


Yo momma so transcendent nothing can describe her.

Wednesday, 14 May 2014

budget: when a surprise is not a surprise


There is something seriously disconcerting in the post-budget rumbling.
It is not that the sounds of discontent are quiet, whispered in simmering rage. Plenty of writers—good writers—have gone on full-frontal assaults against what is laid bare and what is implicit in the Hockey-Abbott budget; who it will impair and who it will outright damage.[1]
It is not even that the response has been too far skewed to a froth-at-the-mouth left. It seems generally acknowledged that the budget has not quite dared to venture into complete austerity economics.[2]
Indeed, people can sort of see the long-term picture of what it is supposedly meant to achieve: return the budget to surplus, eventually leading to decreased income-tax. It is just the means of achievement seem rigorously shifty, framed around cuts to elements like education and health that, otherwise left alone, contribute to a stronger economy in the long term—to generalise: smart, healthy people make more money to be spent—alongside marginal tax hikes (sorry, new levies) for higher earners, which unlike the changes being made to welfare safety nets, are apparently temporary.
It is not even, beyond the print and internet media, that social media has been mute on the topic. People have been exchanging articles and graphs; liking and sharing; discussing and angrily railing against. Memes pointing out the inherent unfairness of it all have already begun their profitable circulation.
I’m sure people are even discussing it first-hand, person-to-person, in the (now-archaic) manner of the water-cooler conversation; that is, over a coffee or a drink, on the way to class, to work, at work, wherever.
No, it is not that a questioning, loudly betrayed and furious discourse around the budget has been non-existent. It is there, in plain view, circulating through disparate groups of people primarily linked through a vast digital network.
What I find worrying—what I have found worrying about politics in general for a long time, irrespective of whether the politicking is coming from the mouths of Labor or Liberal politicians—is the complete lack of surprise: in the blatant lies told; in the disadvantaging of already vulnerable members of society; in the ultimately myopic nature of the policies; even in our own lack of surprise in not being surprised.  
Sharp-Paul writes, “it says something about the cartoonish brutality of the 2014 Federal Budget that it was still an ambush… even after the tough talk.” I can’t say I entirely agree with this. It may feel like an ambush and in feeling like an ambush we believe it is: making the surprise we don’t truly feel an emotional, reactive reality.
Yet, this was all laid out. The Abbott government has never shied away from its underpinning (essentially) neo-conservative ideology: small government and a blind faith in capitalism.
It cannot be an ambush if we willingly walked into a trap we knew was there or chose not to notice.
Our apparent surprise comes from the fact we need a sensation of being ambushed to lend some sense to our shock; to our thick disgruntlement about the whole thing. It’s not comfortable to not be surprised when outright betrayal should be the appropriate response.
It all comes back to what politics essentially amounts to in our contemporary age.
Jonathon Green, writing for The Drum, argues “this Budget marks … another decisive step in the distancing of the political class from the interests of the public it nominally serves, another step toward politics' slow conversion into pure performance.”[3]
This is the spectacle of Australian politics. We should never have been ambushed, or non-ambushed, because the budget is pure theatre with a pre-set populist, vote-driven narrative that, unlike Hamlet or Waiting For Godot (at least on a literal level), has the capability of encroaching on public life. 
We’re always waiting for the next performance to give one star to, the next prime-ministerial lead actor and supporting treasurer to act out their pantomimed gestures of leading the public.
It amounts to politics disconnection from reality that implacably leads to a disenchantment with our elected figures or, more particularly, politics in general. Surprise evaporates.
While we bluster and write scathingly, it is tattooed with a sense of futility; with the helpless hopelessness of being perpetually ambushed even as we see it coming.
Then why, if the state of things is so degraded, do we fail to enact genuine, healthy, pragmatic change towards an admittedly idealistic notion of a greater good?
Is the disconnect between the spectacle of politics and the reality everyday life so great that we are we just too fucking tired anymore to fight, making spectres of us all?
Has the image of protesting, of having a say, of having your opinion heard been irreparably damaged by such groups as the Socialist Alternative or other far left cohorts, so that committing to a loud stance—no matter how informed by fact—now comes with the awkward stigma of a kind of extremism?
Are we shyly self-conscious about speaking out on behalf of other people? Speaking for ourselves? Do we value independence too much? Has contemporary politics fostered such a transcendent notion of independence that it seems the only viable option, despite the biological sociability of humans that needs us to work together?
Has dialogue between the two sides of politics been so eroded as to become a merely a slanging match? Has the necessary balance between conservatism and progressivism been rendered obsolete as each spectrum retreats to their camps? Or has a genuine and important political opposition come to meet, and die, in a nowhere centre where the least amount of people become offended and little is truly accomplished beyond a maintenance of power?
I don’t know. Probably all the above in one way or another.
What I do know is that the budget has produced an exhausted cynicism that although conducive to a certain rage, also leads us straight down the road to no true alternative in our implicit acceptance. Cynicism is a state that exists so much in its own cause that there is nothing beyond cynicism: it compiles its own endless borders. The challenge needs to be louder than these—mine and others’—words.
It needs to become its own reality.




[1] Edward Sharp-Paul nails the immediate and symbolic connotations of the budget (from a fairly wide perspective): http://junkee.com/junk-explained-what-we-think-about-the-2014-federal-budget/34215

Matt Grudnoff notes also the attack on ‘core Australian values’—universal education and health— http://www.abc.net.au/news/2014-05-15/grudnoff-budget-hacks-away-at-our-core-principles/5454328

Although tending towards the hyperbolic at times, Ten Things at thevine.com, has been foreseeing this budget coming for quite some time and has been vicious in its attacks concerning its fractured equitability: http://www.thevine.com.au/life/news/10-things-everything-still-not-awesome-20140515-281349/?utm_source=thevine&utm_medium=featured-rotator&utm_campaign=internal-testing

Sunday, 11 May 2014

sometimes it feels like we only go backwards, baby

There is beauty in every emotion, even the bad. No matter how helpless you can feel before them. It all amounts to a realization of your humanity, of who and how you are. They may resist what you want to be, what you want them be, but as they slip from your grip, inching deeper inside you, crystalizing and evaporating and clarifying and distorting in equal measure, they can only be what you and they are.
It is what it is.
We may recoil from the bad ones, from their immense weight, finding them over and again to be embedded in the everyday as we try to avoid them, but they’re important. They are an aspect of you, of your capacity to feel. Without them, we would have no notion of the spectacle of the good emotions, their significance, their definition of what is, what feels, right. We find balance in our world, we find what is supposed to be beautiful in what is not and this makes them significant. They define us, how we react to and within the world. How we shape a memory, the present, and a future.
In a sense, this is blank idealism, a hopeful reconstitution of what makes us feel ordinary so that we feel less ordinary about it. Within it, we never feel like these are things we are ok with, we’re never likely to think that this will add to the sheen of what makes us happy. It is almost impossible to conceive it that way. They are, in the end, as much us as any other thoughtful motion or intellectual insight or conscious recollection, and as us we cannot separate ourselves from their ominous bearing. We can only see from within, not from without, even as we strive to move through them, to see an other side we implicitly know is there, no matter how distant, impossibly vague.
It’s funny, then, how buried in ourselves, we can still find means to understand ourselves in different mediums; how states of mind open up certain works-of-art—namely music—to a more robust significance, how they can better explain being in a few verses and a catchy chorus than I can in 600-odd words. I guess, this is the other side of emotion; that, without it, we cannot always sympathize or empathize with what a musician or artist or writer is trying to transmit.
I would not say it’s twee as being eye-opening, as having some curtain parted for revelation to shine in, but in moments of being so caught up in yourself that there is only yourself, to hear, observe, be party to something that mirrors an aspect of you is to be suddenly less isolated. You can see that something constructive or meaningful can come out of anything. Someone gets it.

Tame Impala aptly sing, ‘it feels like I only go backwards, baby. | Every part of me says, go ahead.’ This is the way these emotions feel. Stagnating, reversing, even as something better, at least different, waits ahead if only you’d reach for it. Perfectly, the song itself rolls in a blissful melody, searching, wondering, but knowingly so, lost waiting for a reciprocation of affection the singer knows is not, probably will not be, forthcoming. He can only be hopeful, tricking himself destructively into not going anywhere, into going backwards.
It is by any measurement a stunning song, poignant and searching in its simplicity. Pop music always does it best. It, like any great truly sad song, sees exactly the inherent beauty in difficult emotion, bringing forth a capacity to love through its pleading, desperate lyrics. We can only long if we feel distance in the first place, if there is a need for us to reach for something better, even as we recognize that we are feeling this helpless longing—‘oh no, not again.’

There is clarity in opposites. An—our—identity in an other. To fully grasp anything is to know its antonym in all its inverse associative logic, emotions and art included.

Sunday, 4 May 2014

there

Can you see me in your computer looking out at you?
I can’t actually see you, but you may be able to see me there
Or imagine that you see me there
Kind of like thinking that an author is talking directly to you
You read their book and there he or she is
Looking out at you and talking to you
Yet, you know, they’re mostly talking to air
Sometimes their friends
Rarely you, the public
And, then, they’re not even really talking at all in there
It’s just writing that you turn into talking that you turn into an author you see in
there
I still feel that if you look closely though you may see my face
Asking if you see me there
Where?
In these words, I guess, is where you may see me there
I like to think that I am projecting myself to you through this poem on your
screen
Across the Internet
Along its cables and wireless transmitters
Across some huge, maybe small, physical space
(I don’t know where you live in Melbourne
I think most people who read this are Melbourne people
So only a Melbourne person would see me there if they can find me there)
Maybe I need to be a little bit more literal so you can see me there
J
See that?
I am smiling at you emotionally
Or was that emoticon-ly?
Usually I wouldn’t be able to ask you if you see me anywhere
But usually I don’t have a ranting distraction to drop myself into
Now I do and I can ask if you see me there
For this I am grateful
The Internet gives everyone a right to expression
And then to wonder if a stranger can see them there
(Even if not everyone’s expression deserves the right to be heard
Should I be heard?
In finally seeing me there, do you think that I should not be heard?)
I’ll write this and look into my MacBook Pro screen
If I look hard enough, I may see you looking back at me
My imaginary reader
Looking

Maybe they can see me there

additional recommendations for the Commission of Audit

The stern face of a man who understands a good service slash ...

Last week the Australian Federal Government’s Commission of Audit released its recommendations about where it believes the fat can be trimmed in government spending in the aim of having the budget reach a consistent and sustainable surplus.
            The report suggested significant spending cuts to family payments, childcare, health care, education, unemployment and pension payments, aged care, and the National Disability Insurance Scheme. Moreover, it also recommended the privatization of ten major government entities—like the Australia Post, the Australian Mint and the Australian Submarine Corporation (I know, I didn’t know we had one of those too)—along with changes to the way the Federal and State governments tax and, in general, do their business.
            Predictably, the report came under heavy fire (primarily, it seems) from the liberal media, for its clear advantaging of numbers over humans.  Indeed, there is almost a cartoonish aspect to the apparent villainy of the recommendations: an image of some rich, fat cats, in black capes and crisp suits, sitting high up in a mansion, gleefully slashing Medicare and the ABC, while, with brandy tinged breath, chortling about raising the retirement age. One can only imagine that after releasing their recommendations, the members of the Commission of Audit retired to the dining room for roast Bengal tiger and rhino horn soufflé.
            But this image is far removed from the truth and the valour of these Commission gentlemen. They had the unimaginably hard task of addressing the maths of government spending and they performed their task with only a minimal, but utterly necessary, prejudice against the lazy poor. Why cast this report as the antithesis of the Bible, as the unholy document of Abbott and Hockey’s budget? When, I believe, it could have gone fruitfully further; that they only scraped the surface of what it is possible to chop and change in terms of government spending and revenue …
            Here are my suggested enhancements and amendments of the Commission of Audit report (these are largely mutually exclusive, but some can work in tandem):

Privatization
Simple really: keep committing to a gradual privatization of Australia itself. We’re a solid investment for any alert entrepreneur. We have an identifiable brand, multiple strong assets (from mining to, um, the Reef), an existent, solid labor pool, and a prime location near Asia.

State/Local Government Responsibility
The Commission recommended a significant shift of government service delivery to those closest to the people actually accessing these services. This would mean, essentially, that State governments would have a more hands on role in supplying things like health and education; that, to speak generally, they’d be largely responsible for their own taxation, funding, models and standards of these things. This is problematic considering the general ineptitude of State governments (see NSW for the last, I dunno, 50 years?). Thus I suggest eliminating State governments all together and returning to a more practical competitive feudal model, where swathes of land would be the responsibility of a new class of knights and lords who would be tasked with supplying the inhabitants of these lands with health, education and public transport services, while also having the option of taking over neighboring lands through negotiation or conflict. The Federal Government would primarily serve in the role of mediator that would set down a set of loose and centralized ‘rules of governance’: they would be the final authority, but have little practical say in the shaping of borders and the supply of services. As the Abbott government seems to desire a mineralization of government size, this makes some sense. The beauty of this model is its inventive orientated base: the knight or lord of a land could refuse to supply services to his/her workers of the land, hording taxes for their own nefarious means, but this would leave them vulnerable to competitive knights and lords intent on pinching their lands with subjects loyal to their benevolent ruler. It encompasses exactly the free-market, capitalist ideology that the Commission of Audit seems to be leaning towards: a Darwinian economic and social system.

Pension
The report recommended raising the retirement age to 70. I recommend eliminating the idea of retirement all together. When someone becomes too feeble—bodily or minded—they should promptly be eliminated; their remains used to fertilize the crops, thus symbolically implying that we never stop working. This also has the benefit of answering to the problem of how to cater for Australia’s ageing population.

Disabled People and Carers
See above. Even the disabled can contribute in my model. Carers would need to find another job (see below).

Employment and Unemployment
We need to become self-sufficient in regards to feeding ourselves. I recommend dismantling the Daintree Rainforest, and any other spare land, for the sake of a new neo-agricultural face of a full and happy Australia. Anyone without work would be sent to work the land formally known as the Daintree, growing things like wheat and corn. Unemployment and pesky unemployment benefits would be easily eliminated.

Childcare Payments
The Commission of Audit recommends decreasing childcare payments for all families; I recommend removing the payment and putting the children to work in Western Australian mines to pay for their own childcare. To make this is even more beneficial, I would suggest exempting Gina Rinehart, and other mining magnates, from occupational health and safety standards—effectively making them immune to child death litigation—for the simple exchange of a slight lift on mining taxes: we’d make more money from our resources that would then not go into problematic things like childcare.

Medicare
Destroy it. Paying for your health is a blatant waste of government funding. If you’re sick, you can’t work, and are thus useless in contributing to stabilizing the budget and should be crop fertilizer. Indeed, anyone who takes any more than three days off for the sake of illness should be eliminated.

School and Higher Education
Privatize ruthlessly. If you can’t afford an education, you probably don’t deserve one.

Rural Disaster Relief
Abolish. Shit happens.

Tax Suggestions
Charge GST at soup kitchens, tax pocket money (and associative costs like Tooth Fairy donations), tollways for cyclists, a 10cent cost every time the word 'mate' is uttered, a beard tax, and continue to raise the price of beer.


Thursday, 1 May 2014

awareness

cos why not put up an old prose(ish)-poem?


Once, in a moment that lacks the requisite panache to label appropriately, I felt the nourishing trickle of consciousness fall heavily away. Breathing, then, through an absent nose, on a face disjunctive and garbage laden, the notion occurred that perhaps wakefulness is a sign of belonging: a chorus line of motions perfectly in sync like puppets on a string.

Sure, we couldn’t be stuffed
                                                but we’d eaten.
                                                                        Couldn’t be rooted
                                                                                                           but wanted to.

The crashing of scraps and hormones and desires dissipate in the sudden vertical disappearance of awareness and the doona envelops this loss like a baby wraps itself around an iron toy which is comforting for the imagination and stands in for its mother who is what it knows of love.  But we’re not a child and I cannot afford to get that confused again, coming back again, then again to that same invalid being.

The surface of the mind as it slowly spirals down what feels like a sink
– but, mate, isn’t anything like a pipe –
is slippery under the touch of my hand. Sincerity, or a solid memory, was never a strong point, so perhaps you didn’t happen.  Though if the warmth that fuels my feelings is absent I’ll always reach for it until someone declares it’s over or something else develops into focus for my whole state-of-being and holds tightly onto the erratic rhythmic drip of the always perplexed thought of together and its notions that in this central moment matter not a jot, not a ‘sweet fuck all,’ as if it was only my idea of it. This time then the last of my heart.